As Nurse’s Week comes to a close, I am reflecting on the past 7 years since I first graduated from nursing school and started practicing as a little baby nurse. Nursing school was very difficult for me, I am the first to admit it. Even though I had worked in healthcare for many years at that point and was always a pretty good student, I was not prepared for how different everything was, how I would have to change how I approached the material and how I studied, and the amount of stress I would feel.

Although none of that compared to actually starting my job as a nurse and having the very real fear that if I make a mistake, I could seriously harm someone. That is something that to this day is on my mind every moment that I am at work.

As I have moved though my career, between departments and hospitals and specialties, I am always amazed by the nurses I have had the privilege to work alongside. From the group of us new-ish nurses who held ortho together overnight and always had each others backs to the absolute rock that is the nursing staff in the emergency room to the one other nurse I work nights with right now who is basically the Cristina to my Meredith, I am so grateful that (for the most part) I have been lucky enough to have so much support from other nurses literally from day one.

A common trend in healthcare, and trust me it still exists, is the whole “Nurses eat their young” mentality. And while I do believe that sometimes, tough love and all that has a time and place, I have only experienced it twice in 7 years. The first time, it was the straw that broke the camel’s back that caused me to leave orthopedics. The second, it was a very humbling moment from me and I took it and learned from it.

I also never thought that I would spend three years of my career working through a global pandemic and see all the problems in healthcare that were indeed present before become so amplified and bad but also so visible. When I left the Emergency Department, I was so overwhelmed and my mental health needed a break from the trauma, the heartbreak, the abuse, and the stress. Nurses went from being “heroes” to being vilified for encouraging people to get their COVID vaccine if they were able. It was such a weird experience that really had a deep effect on me so I knew I needed to remove myself somewhat from the bedside.

So now, as I look forward to any new changes that may come in my career, I am reflecting on what it means to be a nurse, why I continue to grow in this career, and how grateful I am for the people that nursing has brought into my life.

I have some updated information and resources in the Nurses tab up top, check it out if you are so inclined!